Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Going through the motions.

Do you ever feel like your just going through the motions?

I do. On a daily basis in fact (weekends not included)

I wake up habitually late, take a shower and leave for work. I drive the BF to work and then get to my office right at 9am.

I get my work done but I feel like half the time I am just fooling around because I can’t convince myself to hunker down and do work all day.

For the most part I enjoy what I do. But I don’t love it.

And I leave at 6pm everyday even though I don’t take lunch. That’s right folks I get paid for an 8 hour day and I work 9! It’s definitely no fun especially because I’m always falling asleep by 4pm.

I feel like I have had to sacrifice many things I wanted to do so that in the long run I would be happy, but that long run keeps getting longer and farther away.

My calendar continues to fill up and I feel like I never have the time or energy to do the things I want or need to do.

I now kinda wish I had gone into teaching so that I could have the summers off. That’s really the way to go, I’m convinced. I could have been getting my Masters and then moving away like my friends, but I didn’t, I landed a job 6 days after my last final and started working 10 days before I actually graduated. I thought that that’s what I wanted…but it wasn’t

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